I think, you are having unconscious fear of penetration or of pain during the penetration. Almost 20 to 30 percent of women have this fear. I understand your anxiety over the issue but let me tell you very basic thing about the solutions of sexual problems. Get relaxed first, so far you remain tense your problem is going to worsen. Penetration can be more painful while you are tense as it causes spasms of vaginal muscles, unconsciously. .Second thing is you need to have patience because it may take some time and efforts from both of you. Your husband may start with his fingers or dilators (available in medical stores) and once you are comfortable, may attempt penetration (after days or weeks). He should not escape from working towards solution by saying he does not care for sex.You may take help of good romantic background music and/or some erotic movies to divert your attention from pain or fear of penetration. You may reduce your anxiety by dreaming up your excitement through imagination.