Sir plz help me in this situation. I’m a married woman with 2 kids. My husband is a business man and he doesn’t have interest in other activities. We live in the same house but we don’t share anything not even bed these days. He doesn’t come to me. Reason doesn’t know, may be stress or workload. I was feeling neglected so to be busy I started chatting. I met a person who became my best friend. He wanted to meet me so we met after 1 year. After this meeting he told me he loves me. He knew I was married and had kids but he says age doesn’t matter in love. I’m about 12 yrs older to him. But I look young coz of my body built. My husband was neglecting me and I had this person to share what I felt so we became very close. He tells me he loves me deeply and I also enjoy his company. We chat 4 long hours. I also like him a lot. Few days back my husband slapped me coz I was helping my mother and took her for her work. My father is bed ridden so my mummy needs help from me. I cried that day a lot. Then decided there was nothing left in our relationship. I decided to say I love to this fellow who met me on chat. Now we use cam also. Everyday he sees me and says I love u. I have developed a special bond with him. I don’t want to leave him as he is my big moral support. He told me to be busy so I joined gym and look more beautiful but my husband doesn’t notice me at all. I want love in my life. Sir plz advice me being close to this guy, am I doing something wrong? If he goes out of my life there would be no reason that will make me happy. I’m educated women and independent. People appreciate me wherever I go 4 my good nature but my husband always find a fault in me. I’m single person who has brought up his children without his help. I do all for my family but only got scolding from him. On the other hand this fellow appreciates me a lot so I get confidence. plz advice dear sir what should I do? Continue this relationship or put an end to this? I need your guidance sir plz help me

You are longing for love and appreciation. Your friend is giving you what you need; naturally you will feel attached to him and on long run, will be emotionally dependent on him. If you want him to continue then avoid sexual relations with him. It has been seen that in such relations once sexual desire is fulfilled, most of the male will start loosing interest. Even in absence of sexual encounters, he may start running away from you but at least he will stay longer. Be prepared to accept that any time he may leave and enjoy the relations. However, when chance permits please clarify with him that there would be no sexual relations between two of us.

Hello, sir I lost my mother 7 years back from then my friends got very close to me in which two of them were girls and rest 8 boys of my same class, school and tuition. Later I always used to have clashes with my fatter about friends. He had sexual relations with our relative I disagreed his relation and due to some of these clashes we used 2 fight regularly. Among my friends, Varma was my best friend. He loved our juniors knowingly I loved him but I never expressed about my love. My father died with lung infection when I was in 2nd inters. The girl whom Varma loved rejected him in our 10th it self and then he himself got closed to me and he proposed me in our 1st year. The next year (2005) I lost my father among all my friends only Varma took me to his house and looked after me. Till now we led a soft going life with small clashes. In 2007 one day I found him talking to his old lover who rejected him (Sirisha) and asked him, he said after a long time I have seen her and she came and talked to me so I even talked 2 her. I took it lightly and forgot it. Later I again found him chatting with her I fought with him and hurt my self, seeing me in blood even then he left me and went away after some days he said sorry and stayed with me. One day he told me to get ready for going out don’t know what happened to him he left me and went away I waited for him till afternoon and I found him going out with his friend I called him on his number and found switched off. I called his friend and he lied me that he did not met Varma. I did not understand why he lied to me. I waited for 2 more hours and called his friend again and cried near him then he said he is with sirisha in room he even said me 2 go there with the other friend who knows the room. His friend took me to room and I found both Varma and sirisha in the room. I took Varma on to the terrace and slapped him that why he proposed me and why he is doing all this .He said sorry and will never repeat this again he asked her to go and then we both fought till night and then went home on his word that he will never meet her. Later in the year ending I went to his relatives house along with his family .He had a habit of drinking and smoking from before. His parents didn’t know that he said he is going to some other relative’s house and went away. Next morning he came to the house where we were, I was playing with his cell and found messages in the inbox and in the outbox that was been chatted with some other girl .I asked him who she was he answered me she was his personal and he didn’t want to tell me .I got hurt and fought with him and for four days .I even did not eat food still he did not care for me. I asked him why he didn’t for me though I was not eating food. I asked him whether he wants me or her, he said she is like her sister and he did not chat with her, his cousin chatted with her, then if she is really like your sister then why are you saying you won’t leave her and getting ready to leave me and went away. After two days he came to me saying he will never talk with her. From then we used to fight because he used to drink. Now a days again he started having some personal phones he goes out saying he had some work when ever I call him, his phone would be engaged. After seeing my number in call waiting he immediately switches off his cell and again after some time he will be on his cell and the same process repeats and switches off his cell. I am getting mad why he is acting like this if. I ask him he, he says ‘I was doubting him’ .Am I wrongly reacting How should I understand him. When he is near to me he says he is very lucky to have me as his girl friend saying I support him well, I understand him well though he did wrong, even he says his friends about me in a very good manner. They all even respect me but when ever he drinks he goes away from me saying he don’t want to be with me. How should I understand him. He said all his friends and some of his relatives that he is going to marry me. But if he drinks he moves away from me what should I do? I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH. Suggest me some thing. How should I change him to lead a happy life?

I think your dependency needs keeps you in this relationship in spite of his repeated cheating. Try to overcome this and be more assertive so that he can stop taking you for granted which is the root cause of his attitude.

Hi, I am 28 years old. I am married and have a very loving and understanding husband. He is my life. My problem is that before marriage I used to masturbate. Due to this I am become satisfied very soon. My husband is two years younger to me may this is the reason or may be that I am working so I have to manage both the things properly I get very tired and want sex just twice or once a wk. My husband is always ready for it. I know its a problem with me that I don’t enjoy sex that much and since is get over very soon it loosens my interest in between also. Secondly, I don’t like oral sex. I just hate to put something like that in my mouth though my husband enjoys it a lot so I do it for his pleasure. Pls tell me what I can do to increase my sexual desire as it may harm my lovely married life.

Low sexual desire may have many reasons. I need to know more about your rearing, early sexual experiences and fantasies etc.
Many women do not like oral sex. You can discuss your preferences with your husband because this may be one of the factors which might be putting you off.
To increase your desire you need to spend good romantic time with each other. Discuss your turn on and turn off with each other. Visual stimulation in form of photographs, movies or fantasizing can help you getting excited.

My mobile no. is +91 98259 20555

Hello sir, I am in a great problem these days. I love a guy from 2yrs who is not of my caste and we want to marry. Also his parents have agreed our relationship but my parents are not. I am trying to convince them from one yr. Also his parents came at my home n talked with my parents but my parents didn’t show any interest and they walked away just like that. Now his parents are pressuring us to get married early. Even I’m ready but I don’t have that much guts to tell my parents. Once mom asked me n I told her that his parents are planning for our marriage next month, she got angry a bit n after that nothing happened at home. Also I am bit tensed that if I marry against their involvement our society n relatives would speak ill. Other thing is that I am not able to show that much happiness for my own marriage because my parents are not getting involved. Pls dr pls help me. Even m not able to talk with my fiancé as he is getting burdened from all sides. Just help n pls tell me how I start a topic at home n tell them, I am getting scared to talk with my parents cos my dad is very short tempered so he wouldn’t listen to me and directly start fighting n hitting me n mom starts crying n cursing me. Do you think should his parents call n tell them? Also how should I forget all this tension n show eagerness for my marriage preparation my in-laws are doing in. Due to all this only narrow minded parents are at fault and I have really started hating them. I have started thinking negative. Pls let me know how I can think positively for all wrong things happening in my life. Sir I really need ur help, I thank u very much from my heart for helping me earlier also. Again I need your help. I hope you would understand what I m saying n what m going through. I am in confusion and very scared. Pls help me. Pls advice

If every things are set at your in-laws’ end and you are ready for it, then you have only one option left for your parents. The option is, give them a deadline; till you will  wait for their permission and then onwards you will go on your way. If you do not have courage to tell this to your dad, tell to your mom; any way it will reach to him. If you have made up your mind for this marriage then be prepared to take your parent’s retaliation. This could be verbal as well as physical.
Getting married without parent’s consent is always stressful and you will keep tense about this. Only relief for you is; you are accepted at the end where you are going to stay for your life.

Sir, I got married one year back. My hubby is very simple person. I m a person who never support demanding & layers people. My in-laws family is of same type. Due to which our relationship is not smooth. He is making differences between us due to his family. As family members are double faced people and plays the roles accordingly. Now my hubby does not supporting & understanding me due to the role-played. As now, I m tackling the things from last one year now I m impatient thinking to break our marriage. Plz suggest me something, I m going in a depression day by day and it effects on my job also.

If your hubby is sensible man and if this is the only problem between you then I think, thinking about breaking marriage is too harsh. Is your husband aware about real problem, I mean attitude shown by your in-laws?  If not, make him aware of that by discussing it in detail. Try to put your feelings in words. Do not blame or abuse your in-laws in your discussion. No one likes to listen bad about his or her parents, brother or sisters. You have to make him aware about how do you feel rather then complaining and show your keenness to solve the problem. Once he is sympathetic about your problem, you may plan joint talk with your in-laws. Never send him alone to talk as your representative; this gives wrong signals to in-laws. When woman is disturbed in her relationship, she cannot concentrate in her work (job). Once your interpersonal issues will get settle down then your emotional and work front will be okay.   

Sir, I’m 19 yrs old. The problem is, I met with an accident few months ago and suffered minor pelvis fracture. In MRI scan report, it is identified that I have a cyst in my left ovary; will that cause any hindrance for my pregnancy after marriage? I’m very confused and worried about this. Please do reply me.

Sometimes cysts cause difficulties in getting pregnant. It depends up on the type of the cyst. Kindly consult Gynecologist nearby for finer details about your problem.

Dear Doctor. I’m 30 years old, Just Married and enough healthy man. My problem is, I’m facing the problem of, when I penetrate it discharge quickly. I’m very much frustrated. Will you please help me out? Best Regards.

Your problem of early discharge is known as Premature Ejaculation. Premature Ejaculation is the most common sexual problem experienced by man. There are certain techniques, which can help you to stay longer. Kegel exercise is one of the very popular and effective techniques to control premature ejaculation. These are the exercises of pubococcygeus muscles (PC) muscles. A man can do these exercises anytime and anywhere and no one will even know about it. To identify the muscles of your pelvic floor stop your flow of urine next time you go to urinal. Contract the muscles tightly holding for 10 seconds i.e. stop urinating in between. Do this thrice a day repeating 10 times. The PC muscles control the urine and semen and firmness of your organ during erection, so keeping them strong will increase ejaculatory control. Even while masturbating or doing intercourse you can practice stop and start i.e. rub for few thrust then stop for a minute and start rubbing again. Just relax on this; it should go away with some time. You may try SSRI (group of medicines) with Doctor’s consultation.