I am 30yrs old married for 5yrs. my family forced me to marry. B4 marriage my in laws seemed good but immediately after marriage they changed. I am the 2nd wife of my husband. The 1st wife is divorced bcoz he was satisfied with her sex relation n others thought he is not capable of sex. I had a lot of torture after my marriage from my in laws. I have a 31/2 yr old child. After marrying to me my hubby proved that he is capable of sex. He is a nice person n he knows what torture I am going thru.wen I was pregnant my in laws told me to leave the house bcoz they r not happy with me during the 7th month of my pregnancy. So I n my hubby bought a new house n separated 4rm the in laws but my hubby still have relations with them. In between my sis in laws hubby wanted to have extra marital relation with me but I refused n told my in laws n hubby abt it. no one believed me. They say I am trying to break to break their relations bet them. My hubby loves sex n now a bcoz of the torture going on I lost interest in sex. I tried to resolve all the problems but all in vein. Even my daughter is against me. She loves her dad very much n always wants him to do everything n my hubby encourages her. Now I am in love with another guy thru net. I know everything abt him n he also knows everything abt me. Even his family knows abt my marriage n everything. He loves me very much n is very caring. He says he can’t live without me. He n his family respects me a lot. He wants to marry me n even I. I feel that I will be happy with that person. He has a good job in his hands. I love him very much n can’t think of my life without him. Is it rite to leave my hubby n my child n goes to him? I am in depression. My boyfriend says the decision is in my hands. He is not forcing me for anything. I don’t want to hurt him at the same time I am confused. I am not happy with my present married life. I feel much suffocated in this relationship of my marriage. Not even my child wants to be with me. I tried a lot to be close to her but nothing worked out n I can’t take my child from my hubby bcoz he loves her very much n she also loves her dad only.pls advice me for this. The person with whom I am in love is very reliable n honest. I want to go to him but still need an advice from u.pls help me.

Last string in your marital life is your child. When you feel detached from your daughter then other consideration hardly matters (because according to you your husband and his family is not good to you). On other hand you have some one and his family who understand and respect you, you should give serious thought to it (as you said he is reliable and honest). However, I will still insist you to think about your daughter one more time, as she is going to loose her mother. If you feel that she is going to be ok with her father and you will not miss her, go ahead.

Hi, I am 29 yrs old married with one son. Doctor my husband had an extramarital affair 4 yrs back at that time I forgive him when he said sorry but later I realized that I was never been able to forgive him. I kept on making him realize that he did blunder to us. In the beginning of our married life my husband totally changed. He always use to see only one side of coin that was from his mothers point of view due to which we had lots of misunderstanding and fights which often ended up in abuse and physical assault. Therefore, my husband later started putting blame on me that I was the reason for his extramarital affair. We had a love marriage. During his affair, I was badly humiliated by him at every point of time. He had a sexual relation with that girl and at the end he also insisted me to help her (his girlfriend) in abortion. I went into depression and still feel that depression hits me on and off and due to which I have loosed all my confidence. Later on, I ended up in affair and physical relation. Due to which the gap started widening up. I am still in touch with my friend but due to geographical distance, we do not have any physical relation. I do realize that the life of such affair is very short and now I am less attached to my friend but somewhere relation between my husband and me has worsened. We don’t fight but I remain quiet don’t feel comfortable in sharing any of my feelings, and he also complains that even he is lonely. We both try on our parts to overcome things and start afresh but after few hours I just loose confidence, go back in the past or start comparing him with my friend with whom I had relation. To be honest doctor I am sick of my situation and want to really come out of this problem so that I can give my son a happy life and upbringing. Please help me doctor…I am really ruining my family life. I keep on crying and also try to suicide…..pls help me

What your husband did is out of male instinct. Although he has to blame you for that, so he can save him from question why he did that?  What you did might be out of your need to get love and affection or may be revengeful act. Now, probably you are feeling guilty from within. Your relationship with your husband has reached to point of indifference and that is even worst then quarreling. Revival is difficult but not impossible. Stop all contact with your friend and try to concentrate on your son, husband and family without any complaints and guilt. Accept what ever has happened without questioning and analyzing. I know, this is not simple but you can always keep on trying. With passage of time, things may start coming in to shape.

My husband struggled a lot in his childhood days. Lost his parents at a young age and became the sole earning member at a tender age. With his hard work and vision, he achieved a professional position that hardly anyone imagines. He is a high rank government officer today. I am totally opposite of what he is I am effervescent, spontaneous and extrovert and he is an introvert. We both love each other and he is quite caring. He is very honest, principled and truthful person. My problem is his negativity. He usually finds fault in everything, particularly things related with me. If I complaint to him about something, he consoles me by justifying others’ behavior. When asked, he says since he considers me as an integral part of his life, he can expect some sacrifices or rather some adjustments only from me and no one else. I am okay with his justification but my problem is why do I have to suffer if he loves only me? His loves gives me criticism, lectures and gyan. Other problem is that he usually holds himself responsible for everything that goes wrong in his family members’ lives. How do I cope up with his temperament where he seems to love only his family members and hates everyone else? Also, he dislikes people who challenge him on anything and tries to prove them wrong and he does it easily coz he is quite well read and usually beats people. Ours is an arranged marriage, I liked him for his simplicity and principles. But I didn’t know that it would take me my lifetime to please him. Being his wife is no more a matter of pride, instead it costs me my happiness as I have to be the prey of his anger that he gets when he sees selfish, culprit people around. I respect him a lot and I am sure he loves me and my 6 months old daughter a lot but how do I make myself submissive to his every move and statement? Moreover, there is another woman officer he seems to admire a lot as she was a primary teacher and worked hard to become a high rank officer! His admiration for her also kills me. Though I know there is nothing between them but he once planned to buy a land in partnership with her and her family. These things upset me immensely and I feel like running away from everyone. Please suggest.

There is nothing wrong with you and how you are tackling the situation. The negativity that he has seems to be integral part of his personality. You may try talking to him in person and make him understand how much it is hampering you. Other than that if you are able to convince him you should take him to a consultant for him to open up and discuss his views freely.

Dear Sir, I’m a great fan of your books and fully agree with the views you have. I have a Question:”Me and My Wife have had a love marriage in December 2009 but right now we are facing great deal of problems in our relations they are now flowing flawlessly I Love my wife a lot. Problem started when Once due to curiosity I saw her messages with one of the common friend of us and was shocked to read the content of Messages exchanged between them, I got mad on this and started spying on my wife and with the course of time quarrals and fights for right & Wrong started between us after all the chaos still I love my wife but am not able to fully trust her like before and I have conveyed this to her also many times major issue between us is Sex from the beginning of our marriage only she is very reluctant to sex matter she don’t even let me get near to her Several times I have told her, fought with her, explained her but Don’t know where the problem is why is she so reluctant to sex. when i try to make physical relation with her she tell me to go to Prostitute or some other lady but just leave her alone, She does’nt even want a child I am very frustrated because of this all this is even affecting our both’s career. I want a Solution to this and can do whatever it takes to make our relations work… I can’t live without her and she does’nt want to live with me… Please help what can I Do

Her disinterest in sex requires detail interview and deeper analysis. As you said in your last line that she doesn’t want to live with you, warrants couple counselling. Please seek counselling in person, guidance on this platform will not work for you as your problem seems to be deep rooted.

Hi doctor, I’m married 5 yrs back and have twin daughters. My husband is very dominant; he doesn’t share with me anything and not even speaks to me freely. He doesn’t respect my feelings. Now a day he avoids me even at night and says women should not insist for sex. I’m very much frustrated and can’t sleep as I miss his attention even at night. I’m from a caring family but he is just opposite. He says that men who respects wife are cowards and he would not give importance to my words. How can I tackle such a person? Now a day he beats me if I insist my views. In fact, he is well-educated software engineer but behaves as a countryman to me. He doesn’t respond to others advice. Pls give me suggestions to tackle him. He blames me that family women should not insist for sex, and he simply avoids me when I’m in mood and forces me to sex when I’m not interested. I love him very much, but his activities make me doubt whether he loves me. Is there any chance to change him?

Mutual respect for each other is prime requirement in loving relationship; unfortunately, your husband lacks it. If he is like this since beginning then you should consider it as a part of his personality. Otherwise, there has to be some reasons behind his attitude. You should discuss about his attitude and about how you feel because of such attitude. You have a chance if he opens up or discuss. Do not get irritated or show your frustration while talking to him. If he gets irritated, keep your cool. You may have to do repeated efforts to bring him to discussion.

Doctor, I am working in Africa and visit my wife once in 6 months. She is not getting orgasm. I also do not last long. During my days in Africa as I was alone, I use to see porn sites and masturbate regularly. I consulted a doctor here he advised me to take Procomil 5mg tablet. In addition, another sexologist advised me to take andriol and vigrx for 6 months daily. I have not started this because I don’t get this here.

Long gape between intercourse and regular masturbation under erotic influence (like pornography in your case) may lead to early ejaculation. I do not think drug prescribed to you will make any difference, as this problem is not related to hormone (Andriol is hormone). You should try Kegel’s exercise. (you may search Kegel’s exercise in search box).
Medicines like Fluoxetine and Clomipramine can also help.

I m girl from Jain family and I love a boy who is my babhis cousin. I love him so much. Moreover, he also wants to marry me and make relation with me. So I want ask to u is that safe to make relation with him with precaution. I also Want to tell u that I m not sure he will marry me or not becoz he clearly say that if his family allow him then he marry me. Therefore, I’m in confusion what to do. What is right and what is wrong. My parents don’t like to make my bf as even my friends. What to do plz give me solution.

He is clear that he wants to enjoy and does not owe any commitment to you. If you are comfortable with this then you can think of going ahead. You have to take necessary precautions. If you ask my advice, I will ask you to stay away from such noncommittal relations as this may give you feeling of being used up in future.

I want to know what the normal size of penis is. I’m having 16cm in diameter and 19cm in length. Is it enough to satisfy a girl?

Average penis length (flaccid/not erect): from 3.4 inches to 3.7 inches (8.6 cm to 9.3 cm). Average penis length (erect): from 5.1 inches to 5.7 inches (12.9 cm to 14.5 cm). Average penis girth (circumference when erect): from 3.5 inches to 3.9 inches (8.8 cm to 10 cm)
These numbers are obviously very different from the sizes we hear (and see) in adult movies, and even the kinds of numbers you read on line.
Female’s sexual satisfaction does not depend on penile length. It depends upon your love & affection for her, quality of intimate moments, warmth in relationship and lots other nonsexual factors.

Sir, I am in love with a girl of 23 years and our relationship is for the last 3 years. 3 years back i had proposed her for marriage and even gone to her home but her parents refused and told that they will get her married after her completion of graduation. Sir I have no father and mother so my relatives said me to marry asap but she promised me that if I can wait she must marry me after 3 years whether her parents accept me or not. I am waiting for her for the last 2.5 years we were regular in contact on phone and now the problem is that she started ignoring me. Earlier she would contact me twice or thrice a day but now I am the only one to cal her but whenever I call even in late nights her no. is going busy. Whenever I call and say that I want to talk she always say she is busy. Sir I had lost my three years and my all relatives even my sister’s love, for her only. I am totally depressed and even now my relatives and my family didn’t want to see me. Is she still loves me or she want me for her needs only. Her graduation is about to complete but she is now saying that she thinks that she needs more time to marry. Sir you understand 3 years of life and family and relatives all get far away. Sir I really love her from my core of heart. Am I too bad that after doing all this she will leave me?

If she has started ignoring you then there are all possibilities that she is shifting from her commitment. You should talk to her in black and white regarding her plan to marry with you. At the same time show your preparedness to accept ‘no’ so that at least she has freedom to tell you. Otherwise, in spite of ‘no’ in her mind she would keep on playing with the issue.

Hello doctor, I need your advice. I want to discuss the problem of my brother and his wife. They had a married life of around 3 years. The problem is the abnormal behavior and short tempered nature of my bhabhi. The problem was started just after their marriage. She got tempered even without any sufficient reason. Sometimes that makes reason of fighting between bhaiya and bhabhi. My brother loves her so much but she makes doubt on him on his each activities. She said that he has relation with other ladies and he interested in other ladies. This is not true. Even we have to be very careful while talking with her because anything can make her tempered. We had tried so many times to know the reason of her short tempered nature but everything is in vein. Now her nature makes her and my brother’s life miserable. Please help us and suggest some way to change her nature.

Was she short tempered and suspicious before marriage? If she was, she may have personality problems or psychotic illness. If she wasn’t, she may have some relationship issues. In both cases it is better to see Psychiatrist. To change some one’s nature, one requires that person’s support and willingness to change. You can not change her nature by changing yourself with out her cooperation in the process.