Dear Hansal, I read your suggestions, which I definitely agree with you. I am female, 24 Yrs, residing in Mumbai. My marriage is fixed as love-cum-Arrange. Though my partner is good in understanding, but my in-laws are not so. They are very very orthodox and conservative. My partner is typically a mama\’s boy. So he doesn\’t understand my thoughts and problems. He remains away from all his responsibilities towards me. All his family and personal issue I came to know since I got interacted with his family i.e. during our engagement. We are sharing approx.5 yrs relationship. As usual before engagement he was nice to me. But as soon as his mother came into picture, he takes and asks for her decision which is final and ignores mine. I spoke to his mother, but of no use coz she doesn\’t speak face to face and straight forward. She will ask other person, who will come to our place and discuss marriage affairs. She is not ready to call us and tell her thoughts. She is very much arrogant and proud. Can you please suggest any solution for it. Marriage mostly would be next year. However, if it happens for everytime, then its better for me to take decision beforehand. We didn\’t have any physical relationship, so I am not in guilt of anything. Please suggest how to handle this situation.

I do not know how you will take this but never ever think that he will change after marriage. If you feel that he is mama’s boy and if you cannot stand to this, get out of this relationship. It may be painful today but better for tomorrow.

I am a married man and my wife is pregnant. Is it safe to have sex during pregnancy? If yes then in tell me about the position and if not then why?

Avoid intercourse for first three months to avoid the risk of abortion. However, chances of abortion are very rare. Then onwards you can do in side-to-side and rear position. You may go for male up position with minimum weight transfer precautions. During last two months, avoid it to reduce the possibilities of premature delivery.

Hi sir, I’m 25 yrs old, my problem is I fall in love with my cousin sister. I m in love since I was 12 yr old, I even didn’t know what is love or infatuation but I liked to sit & talk with her. But she didn’t know anything about it. Last yr when we had such incident that we proposed together & we were in love like kissing & smooches (not sex). Now she is going to marry next month. I m in problem, I’m not able to help myself to forget this. My mind is not ready to accept her wedding. Please help.

I would not call it love. At the age of 12 (and one sided for 13 years), it must be an infatuation. She involved herself into kissing-smooching and decided to marry within a year suggest that she was never serious about this. Might be some pleasure seeking behavior on her part. You need to understand and accept this; rest will be taken care by time. 

Respected sir, my girl friend and I used to do oral sex few months ago. But she feared because she thought it can make her pregnant. Please tell me, is oral-sex safety from birth-control? Please help….

Oral sex never causes pregnancy.

Dear Doctor…!!! I’m a 25 year old guy, I’m gay and I have no issues with that. Let me just brief you about my past .I had a very good strong and healthy relation with my ex-boyfriend (who is gay too). I had to quit him relation because he got married then due to his parental force. After that, I moved away from that city and settled in a different city now. It’s been more than 2 years I saw him. We just used to talk on phone and sms each other. Now we both have decided to have an extra marital affair for life long. We both are immensely in love with each other. All this while I’d been telling my heart that this is wrong. I tried to meet couple of people as well to forget that person, but it dint work. Now finally we have decided to be together. Please advise me……

Both of you have decided to have a lifelong affair but then what about your friend’s wife and kid (if he has). You should discuss about this before you go ahead because this can be a source of conflict in your friend’s life. I understand you attachment with him but if you can stay without seeing him for 2 years then you can live with out him, just think over.

Hello sir mine is a little strange story. I am from India. I am about to get married in November. This is a arrange marriage which has been fixed by my parents with my consent. The boy is very nice and sweet but he speaks less. Problems:- After my engagement he did not call me to chat I think as he is a shy guy so I should initiate, when I initiated then he did not speak much to me but it was his nature. to make him to call me I stopped calling him. When I stop calling him he starts calling me and starts showing his interest in me. Every thing was going wonderful then suddenly he disclose that he was having a very serious relationship in past which some how could not materialize. I told him that’s OK if you had an affair in past but it should not be in present. He said does it really matter when I am marrying you and not her. I said yes if you have that relationship I will not continue with you. Then I told him to take his mom’s swear and said that she is no more in his life. Every thing was OK. Then after sometime somehow that conversation started again and I reacted in a very bad way and cut the phone. Then suddenly I realized that he may break the relationship with me so I felt insecure and started chasing him badly, in fact very badly but he did not pick my phone for two days. From that very day he got to know that I am mad after him so he has started taking me for granted. He doesn’t call me, when I call him some time he picks up phone sometimes not. Please help me. Question-How should I make him to adore me and call me again like the way he used to do earlier? How can I determine if he is a genuine guy or not?. I believe that he is but he has stopped caring for me. Please help. I want him back the way he was.

I think first you make sure that his previous relationship is not continuing right now. Secondly, stop running after him. I believe genuine guys never show such kind of attitude. Try to rise above your insecurities and stop craving for him. If he comes back then he is yours otherwise he never meant to be!

Hi sir, I heard a lot about you from news paper Gujarat Samachar so many times it helps me to control my stress. I am very sensitive person. I am always thinking about various things. Actually I always think I never sleep peacefully until I take Alprex. I panic for small things. My 2nd problem is that my 68 yr old mom is in terrible state. She had some problem with my brother who has come to India from London for three weeks. Since last month she is not eating properly and constantly crying and cursing the situation. I tried a lot but I couldn’t help her. So please if any way you could help me I would be very much obliged. If I am given appointment I would love to visit you with my mom. I will eagerly wait for your positive reply. Thank you for reading this.

Call 079 400 10 297 for an appointment.

When I was 26 a girl showed her love by her motivational words and works. But I think she is not so beautiful. But others say she is beautiful. For 3 days we were in relative’s house. After that I forgot her. But one day she came for marriage function, but she kept a distance and answered what I asked .At that night I felt depressed, I loosed my mind power. After a week I went to her office to talk. I love her. I am not going to love any other girl until death. But at that time her manager came and asked me about what I want? I said, she is my friend and waiting for her. But suddenly she told her manager that I was only a normal friend and told me that I am busy. I never expected it. I loosed all power and started drinking alcohol. My question is, girl loves the money or social status or beauty or some other thing? Or they want sex or love?

She has never told you that she loves you. It was your perception, which is not true. She does not consider you as good friend even. You cannot compel someone to love you by just loving them. Try to accept this fact and move ahead in life.

During sex, my wife shares her premarital sex experiences when she is aroused. During sex, I also enjoy those things. However, after sex those things hurt me a lot.

Erotic talks during sex are normal, in fact desirable to increase sexual pleasure. Talking about your own sexual experiences with someone else may give you pleasure during the act but later on it may be traumatic and damaging self-respect of both partners. You should decide to stop talking about your personal past experiences and may continue talking about non-personal erotic imagination or fantasies.   

Dear Sir, Myself Chiranjit and I’m from Kolkata. I love one of my classmates in Management College. We were in relationship last 5 months. In the beginning we had good bonding but slowly problem comes out between us. She is staying in a hostel and she has 2 room mates. Sometimes we have some problem but still we manage. Now I’ve a friend and we three, that means I, my girlfriend and my friend hang out together. She shares her feelings in my absence to my friend and they come closer. One day I explore that she broke up with me and now in new relationship with my friend. The boy took the chance and accepts the relationship. I still love this girl and miss her too much. When she broke she had only two reasons that I’m not financially balance and my standard is not up to the mark. But the real scenario is not like that. Kindly suggest what to do? For both of us it was our first love. Waiting for your reply.

If she is not interested in the relationship for any reason (which is evident from the fact that she has broke up and now into the relationship with your friend) you should not compel her for the same. See, relationship is something which should come naturally and not by compulsion or by pushing yourself on some one. The fact that you still love her cannot bring her back to you. Even if she comes back, you cannot trust her for similar repetition at any point of life. Best thing is end up this and move on.