I love a girl very much and we even are planning to get married in future. Recently we got very intimate and she knows that I am responsible and I won’t make any mistake but later that same day she decided not to be so intimate again but I feel very happy and comfortable when we are intimate. And now I feel like being intimate with her a lot. Now she’s very firm with that decision so please tell me what I should do. Should I ask her to change her decision or should I change myself?

If you do not want to lose her then change yourself.

I’m into a relation since past 2 years. My BF is obsessed with sex. He wants to have it each time we meet. He thinks that we should keep kissing, smooching, indulge in sexual pleasures. It is ok for me at times but each time, I don’t like it. What should I do? If I refuse it, he says I don’t love him.

You have to tell him that you don’t like it every time. It is not a measure of love. He is exploiting you in name of love. Do not succumb to his desire every time (He might be treating you as a sex object) and try to maintain your self-respect in the relationship.

Dear Sir I have an unusual problem and even do not have a friend to solve it .I have a relationship with a person from last 5 years everything was going all well but some ego problem came in between and now he shifted himself to some other place we always use to fight on some or the other problem and for the first time we had a fight where we did not talked for about more than a month ,I love him still but not able to understand his opinion about the relationship he is not saying anything till now is this a break up or he want to continue whenever I ask him such questions he gets angry I cannot understand him completely is he seeing someone else or he doesn’t want to continue any more Please help now I am totally frustrated because I am not able to concentrate anywhere else.

It is really very frustrating when relationship does not seem to be working, particularly for woman. You should not avoid discussion just because he becomes angry when you ask him about relationship. Do not start talking about your relationship suddenly. Instead you tell him that you want to talk about your relations and fix up the meeting for that purpose only. This will make him mentally prepared for the discussion and compel him to think about it. If he does not turn up for the meeting or show no eagerness to meet for the purpose then probably you are heading for the break up.

I’m 21 and my fiancé is 20. We both are Christians and both strongly believe in waiting for sex until marriage. We’ve been dating for a year and have plans to get married next year. Lately I’ve been having a problem. I’m strongly attached to my fiancé emotionally. I get very needy and clingy when I’m with her and she does to me too. Being “male” I often find my mind wandering off and occasionally daydreaming about having sex with her; as with every male I’m sure will think such things. Lately I’ve been having uncontrollable muscle contractions in my chest, starting when I think about sex with my fiancé. Being at the peak age of my sex drive it’s hard not to think about it, even if I try to distract myself. On several occasions she gets very worried about the contractions and will cry in vain, even to the point of vomiting because there’s nothing she can do. She’s offered to “Just do it” in hope it will make things better for me, but I reject. I’m running out of options as I find myself in this emotional mood with my fiancé getting more and more frequent. I’ve asked around and done research and find nothing positive out of premarital sex, so I wouldn’t want to consider it unless it was really something that would cure it. The muscle spasms get harder and more frequent and I can’t pinpoint a reason why. Is the love for my fiancé that strong? Is my “male lustful” anatomy and strong emotional connection with my fiancé combining causing me to have a breakdown? Is it stress caused by my neediness? All I know is that it got so bad one night I had my first migraine in over three years last week. Please help.

Having sexual urge at this age is very normal. Your muscle spasm has nothing to do with your manliness and not all male will have it in condition like yours. Most probably it must be a result of stress generated over your sexual suppression (suppressing physiological arousal).
If you want to avoid intercourse before marriage, you can do either of this, ask her to help you in masturbation or masturbate on your own fantasizing about her.
Migraine is known to occure in such kind of stressful conditions.

Hello sir, I have left a couple of questions earlier also & I got valuable & effective answer. Again, I need your help on two concerns. 1. We are three brothers & I am 2nd child in family. Me & my elder brother both are married and my mom is suffering from mental disorder that somewhere lies between Schizophrenia & Bipolar disorder as told by psychiatrist. She is having this problem for last 14-15 years. Since that time to till now she is taking the medication on & off basis whenever situation turns bad. We take her to doctor who prescribe Risdone name tablets which she consumes it in less quantity than prescription & only for few days (when we force her) until she gets ok. Sometimes, she speaks rudely & abusively to my wife & sister in law and suspects them unnecessarily for small things and other family members also i.e. me, my brother and father when we try to make her understand about her mistake. My question is that can it cause any problem for her in future by taking Risdone tablet on less quantity and irregular basis (just for 15 days or 20 days after occurrence of problem) in term of causing any physical or more mental problem in future and is it possible that after some time this tablet will stop working because of growing age or some other reason, which is helping us now at the time of crisis. My 2nd question is about myself. I am very introvert, shy, under confident & unable to speak publicly person but I want to be good public speaker because this is the requirement of my job and can help me to grow there. Please advise me how to overcome all these shortcomings and elaborate visualization, self hypnosis and some other techniques & how can I practice for them.

Your mother requires a very regular medication in context of prescribed dose as per the doctor. As an irregular treatment or need full ailment is almost no treatment. Secondly your issues need to be dealt in and planned a structure way, you can meet a psychiatrist, psychologist or a counselor who can help you do the required.

I am 20 years old male 3 years back I attended the self sex this bad habit continues more than two years, so now I’m afraid. So my doubt is will this bad habit cause any problem in my marriage sex life? And it causes any problem in my penis and sperm?

First of all, remove the guilt that it is bad. It is normal physiological urge. As such masturbation is not harmful but sometimes (particularly in daily masturbators) it may result into premature ejaculation (early discharge). It does not cause any problem in penis or sperms.

My boy friend feels our ethics and personality do not suit for us to continue our relationship. But we have been sexually well engaged which makes me feel guilt if we fall apart. He is so much an idealist and I am indifferent kinds. How do we work on this?

If he would have really been idealistic on actual grounds and he believed that you are not appropriate for him then he would have not initiate sexual activity. This indirectly suggest that ethics, morals and idealism are just words use to get  from you in reality he is no more interested in continuing this relation and wishes to move on. I know this might be too hard for you to accept but still it requires serious insightful thinking and depending on that take your decision.

I’m in therapy for military sexual trauma. I was raped and sodomized by more than one service member. I saw the man who sodomized me some months later with a woman. My therapist asked me if I was jealous. Why would she even think of asking me this?

Just to confirm your sexual orientation, I suppose. You may feel  jealous,  if you are passive homosexual. 

I am 23 years old. I have problem of my penis foreskin, which is very tight and doesn’t go back. So can you suggest me the best solution for this? Sir please suggest non-operative and painless treatment. I am much worried about it because after 2 months am going to marry.

The only treatment for this condition is minor operation called circumcision. There is no other alternative so please do not waste time.

Dear Sir, I got married 3 months before, one night I felt erection and also an urge to go to toilet. After coming from toilet I tried to do sex with my wife, but I didn’t get full erection. I tried twice but failed. I want to know that is it normal? Otherwise our sexual life is good, but I’m very confused that what happened that day..?

This is absolutely normal. You may lose erection sometimes without any reason. Do not give second thought to it and increase your anxiety, which in turn can cause performance anxiety and erectile dysfunction. Forget it and enjoy your sexual life.