Respected sir, I’m d fan of your column in guj samachar. As many of young girls, I’m also facing a problem regarding my relation with my dear one. It has been very difficult for me to judge that if my dear friend thinks seriously about our relation or not. We were very close friends before some time; I felt some times that he had feelings for me. I also felt same, before 3 months I told him about my feeling and proposed him. He gave me positive reply too, and then we had lovely talks on phone regarding our love for a few days. But the main problem started when I asked him to meet my parents. We both belong to a different caste and diff family status. After some days, he suddenly stopped calling or messaging me. Whenever I asked about our future, he couldn’t give me satisfactory answer and told me to leave it upon time. Another and main problem is that when we were just close friends, he was very near to me; he sent lots of msgs and care for me until I proposed him. He was very frank to me and never hides anything in spite his friends told him to do so. But after I proposed, I lost my dear friend too. Now he rarely sends me msgs and has stopped calling me. When I asked about, he always ignores me. He means a lot in my life. After he met me, my point of view to life has totally changed. He never tried to flirt. Initially he asked to meet me and spend some romantic moments together, but after I refused, he never forced. He’s not a liar and is not cheating me at all but has really lack of strength that a boy should have in his love life. I always told him frankly as a friend that it’s not necessary for him to feel same like me. He can refuse and still we can remain dear friends. But…I’m much tensed nowadays. It was really a great time to be friend of him. But as I desired to make my friend a family, I lost a real friend too. Now hardly we talk by msgs. He replies very rare. He’s trying to avoiding me. Pls sir, can you help me out? I’m really much tensed. Is he really loves me or not? He told that he’ll ask for me in his family after some time but he knows the chances to accept us are very rare and he’s not willing to go against his family. We had not even any romantic meeting till now. We just met 2-3 times occasionally and our friendship grown by calls and msgs. He’s really supported me many times when I really needed a friend. When my family member had a problem and I was alone to face it all, he gave me real support and strength without any expectation. Before I met him, I never knew what love was. I always laugh at people in love and told that it’s not a thing for intelligent people. Our friendship was going on very nicely. I thought that I got everything now. We were really frank to each other. I regret for my feeling now. I’ve lost the person dearest after parents. Can you judge what he might be thinking? Shall I ever get my dear friend back? pls answer me sir. I’m really a strong girl and had faced many difficulties in life with strength and courage. I never lost at all despite of failure in some field. but this time I can’t control myself. I felt sometimes that I’m finished mentally. Please show me the way that I can get my dear friend back. He’s my real strength. Pls help me sir. I’ll be very thankful to you. I also can’t concentrate on my career.

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All signs you have narrated are going in favor of loosing interest in relationship. Accept this. I understand that he has been a great emotional support to you but you can not compel some one to do that. I do not think that people get back in to the same emotions, once drift apart emotionally. Even though, you may try to get him back by maintaining simple relation with him. Do not ask or try to drag him in emotions. If he has to come back, he will come back emotionally. Sooner you accept this, lesser will be the pain.