Hi, I’m very much worried about my daughter’s future. I’m 30yrs old working in MNC, having a kid, she is 3 yrs old. My husband passed away 2 years back when my daughter was 7 months old. We lived a peaceful happy life. We got married after a great struggle bcoz of caste difference. However, we lead life as husband and wife for only 1.5 yrs but we are lovers for 6 yrs before marriage. Till now I love him a lot. I believe he is with me even though he is not physically present in this world. Five months before, I decided to get married by thinking of various family situations and thinking of my daughter’s future. Also bcoz of the Guy who proposed me who know my entire past story and I believe I can adjust myself and still I know he is very genuine. As he has grown up very lonely, he is not having mentality to adjust for even simple things. He is very short temper and very sensitive and he gets angry for very silly things. He never accepts his mistakes. I managed to adjust all this by thinking my daughters future in mind and my daughter is not matured enough to adjust him. So there the problem is starting. Still his need is privacy and he never tried to understand what I really like, dislike. Only thing He wants me to understand him and we (me and my daughter) should behave accordingly. If I missed to do that in any situation, he will scold me. Even if the mistake is on his part, then I use to beg him to pardon me in order to resolve the issue and to make the life to normal flow. I believe these are beginning, when my daughter grow up, she will get affected when she comes to know that he is not her real father. He will decide things easily and I’m afraid that when she grow up and if she tell anything against him then everything will be collapsed. However, I’m living in this world to take care of my daughter. Now I start thinking that I should not have get married bcaz if I’m alone I can manage but now I don’t know how to explain things to my daughter. At the same time, I can’t explain to my husband who never likes to listen explanations. once in a while he will show his affection but approximately Every day we are facing different incidents and I’m learning new lessons which I should not do in future. I feel very tough to adjust for my whole life. For the past years in my life, I was independent and I was in very comfort zone. Now upside down, still I like to have healthy relationship with him but I do not know the way to make it up. Need your suggestion.

I think, you made a mistake by not discussing the main purpose of your marriage, before hand. Your main priority was your daughter’s future and you should have clarified this to him before marriage. Now that you are married to him, you need to bring this issue very tactfully so that he will not feel offended. Try to share your worries regarding your daughter and her relationship with him, particularly when he is in a good mood. Plan outings, small vacations and try to spend some quality time together (all three of you). This will increase your bonding with each other.